Happy Festivus

Well, its been another happy festivus for the rest of us.

Christmas with my dad

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts. ~Kahil Gibran

I was thinking of this poem today.

We drove an hour and a half to meet my father for lunch. That was not how I envisioned spending the Christmas holiday with him, which is odd because my vision is something that has never actually happened. My vision takes place over a few days, a fire is going in the fireplace, we're all drinking eggnog and laughing while the kids open presents. Its a made-for-TV version that I've made up somewhere along the way and then held out to be "normal" even though its never been the norm for us.

Although we talk at least once a week; I last saw him over eight months ago. When asked to visit, he'd say, "sure, we'll hatch out a plan." A month or so later I say, "next weekend," and he says, "put me down for a maybe." As the date approaches he suggests meeting halfway for lunch instead.

If you know my father, you're probably laughing by now. It is so typical--and my holiday vision is so obviously not. This is the man who left my wedding immediately after the father-daughter dance. We hadn't even cut the cake yet. He refuses to drive down on holidays because of the traffic and "besides," he says, "who really cares about the actual day?" I just don't get it. He's retired and I'm his only child, its not like he has a busy schedule.

Thus, Kahil Gibran's poem came to mind this afternoon. Not only can we not make our children think and be like us, but we can't make our parents either.

What Kahil failed to say is that the real folly of expecting the people in our lives to become our vision of who we think they should be is that we miss out on who they actually are.

For years I kept expecting him to do things he just wasn't going to do. This was my failing, not his. I wanted him to be exactly like I thought he should be which only took the focus off of how great he already was.

He's the dad that stopped everything and built me a treehouse because I wanted one right then. Okay, so it didn't have any railings and telling a five year old to just "not get too close to the edge" is probably not the safest idea...but still it was a pretty cool treehouse.

He's the dad that every year on my birthday will call me and tell me the story of my birth adding in how amazing it all was. And when he tells me about his own life he tells the real stories, not the happy-go-lucky ones other dads tell. And when he tells me that he'll always love me no matter what and that he'll always be there for me, I know he means it.

So, when asked if I was disappointed to not see more of him this holiday, I honestly answered "no." I miss him, I would have liked to have seen him more, but he is who he is and I love him as he is.

Life is half spent before we know what it is

As a child, I remember staring at the clock in class and thinking how excruciatingly long it was until the bell rung and school was let out. And all the lazy summers that seemed to last forever.

The days are flying by now as if Monday and Friday are consecutive days of the week without any time in between. I'm to the point that I have to stop and do some math anytime someone asks me my age in case I've missed a birthday or two.

My father says when he used to drive an ambulance he met this 90 year old woman once who told him, "If you think time is going fast now, just wait until you're my age." And maybe that's the way it is. The more time you have under your belt, the faster it seems to go. Afterall, how long is a week to a child who has lived so few? Its all relative. A mere 24 hours drags on endlessly for a mosquito while 60 years passes in the blink of the eye for a tortoise.

Anyhow, what I'm trying to say is that I've just been too damn busy to update the blog. So in the attempt to catch up--here's what's been going on.

Andre's mom, Carmen, came to stay with us for a while during her annual visit to see children and grandchildren. The girls had a great time with Abuelita. They dressed up as penguins for her.




They even had very fancy tea parties--complete with raised pinkies and fancy hats. Of course, Joey the dog, has to be present at any event that provides food of any kind. He never complains about the quality of the food--only the quantity.




Next, Thanksgiving happened where we stuffed ourselves silly, then did it all over again the following day. We drove to Kileen to celebrate with Lynette, Ivette and family. I love spending Thanksgiving at their place. Not only is the food fabulous, but the company is even better.

The girls loved Lynette's piano. I swear they were just on the verge of playing "Heart and Soul" and setting out a tip jar. Seriously speaking, the one who could play it and play well was Isabella. She has really excelled on the piano. She even played a softer song to lull Rowan to sleep at the end of the night. I'm so proud of her and can only imagine how much farther along she will be next Thanksgiving.

Little Austin was the ever sweet, wonderful cousin he always is. He played with the girls so much they were ready to follow him anywhere. Here is Austin showing Rowan how to play the piano.










The following day we had Thanksgiving again at my mom's with my family. My Aunt and Uncle and their kids came down too. Its always great to see them. Brian even drove down from College Station. I was so busy eating way too much and lounging around that I completely spaced on picture taking.

The next week we drove to a nearby Christmas tree farm, picked out our tree, and Andre--being the lumberjack that he is--cut it down. It was the first time I had ever gotten a tree from a tree farm, and it was the first tree Andre and I had ever had. It was a truly neat experience, plus, we got a tree locally grown, that was very reasonably priced and it was fun.












Christmas trees and toddlers is an interesting, insane combination. We have certainly discovered a new way to count down the days until Christmas. Some people have advent calendars, but we just lose a few more ornaments from the bottom of the tree every day. By Christmas day we will only have the very top of the tree decorated. See it works perfectly because without the ornaments it makes it much easier to then take the tree down after Christmas.



The funny thing is that the girls know they're not suppose to take the ornaments off, so you'll rarely catch them doing it. Yet, I'm finding more and more of them missing. The other fun pastime is moving the presents from under the tree to other locations around the house. That, and jumping on them.

That brings us up to this weekend. We went to Galveston for Adrienne and Javier's wedding. The bride was gorgeous and the wedding was a blast. They had a traditional Catholic wedding and the reception was in an old hotel that most, if not all, the guests were staying at. It was really a lot of fun. We were able to catch up with lots of cousins, aunts and uncles, which of course, makes you realize how long its been since everyone was together and how we should try to get together more often.